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Posted on: 08-Apr-2022 12:20:33

Forgiveness is a difficult concept for many people.

Many people who have been hurt either physically or emotionally by another person will feel bitterness anger, resentment and will want revenge against that person.

The majority will say that they will never forgive that person for hurting them, as they believe that by forgiving that person they are letting them off or condoning their behaviour without any recourse.

I have helped many clients that have been abused mentally and physically, cheated on, lied too, including victims of child abuse, let go and move on from the past.

Anna’s story

A few years ago I worked with a young woman who was suffering from anxiety, lacked confidence and self esteem, she didn’t like her image and thought that she was not good enough.

It transpired that her father was an alcoholic, who had committed suicide when she was a teenager he was physically and mentally abusing her mother for many years. She had a little sister who she adored and would hide with her when the father came home drunk from work and the ritual of shouting, destroying items and abusing her mother. He would destroy her toys and books that meant so much to her and she told me that she hated him, she felt anger, resentment, abandonment and felt unloved by him.

Together we worked on all the negative emotions she still felt for her father with wonderful results, but the hardest and most difficult area to deal with was taking that final step forward to forgive her father.

We managed to work with Acceptance which really helped her but the sticking point was that she could not forgive him.

Forgiveness v’s Acceptance

I explained to this young woman that she needed to forgive her father because forgiveness is to do with her not her father and by forgiving him she can totally set herself free from him, his behaviour and let him go.

Recently she returned and we worked with forgiveness, Anna tells me that she feels

happier, lighter and free from her past and feels that she is enough and feels like a new person.

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